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Unneeded Decorations

Christmas 2020 has come and gone. We were all so ready for it this year - more than most. I always look forward to Christmas - especially getting the decorations out and making our home look like a Christmas cottage.


My wife told me that this year, one of her favorite memories was lounging in our living room under all the Christmas lights and decorations. We even slept on the couch together two times this year - a first for us.


A less favorite time at Christmas is putting all that stuff away. It is a bit of a task and it marks the official end of the Christmas season. This year we worked a little harder to get rid of some unnecessary and unused Christmas decorations. We tend toward minimalism in our home. We figured we would apply that to our decorations too. So we got rid of the unused and emotionally meaningless decorations. My wife kept going and cleaned out her closet. I haven’t done that yet.


I am, although, cleaning out a different closet - my emotional closet. As many people do, I have a pretty cluttered emotional closet. Every once in a while it seems like one of the boxes of emotional junk jumps off the shelf and explodes into my life and into the lives of people around me. Over the years I have learned to deal with the emotional junk: labeling it and putting it away and even getting rid of some of the junk altogether, like unneeded Christmas decorations.


This year at Thanksgiving I realized that some of my junk has a little more hold on me than I thought it did. It happened when I watched a movie that triggered some past trauma in my life. It was a pretty drastic reaction that made me cry (just a little) and upset my stomach so much that I about lost my Thanksgiving dinner.


In the past, I would recover a few minutes (or hours) later and move on. This time I took more note of my reaction. I thought through it and talked through it with my wife and some trusted friends. I felt like I needed to do some harder work to get rid of those “emotional decorations” in my life.


So I am doing that work... on purpose and with purpose. I am getting some help to do that work!


At first when I circled back with my friends, I was a little embarrassed to tell them I was seeking some assistance in dealing with my junk. Part of me thought since I am a pastor and life coach that regularly helps people with their stuff, I should be able to do the same with my own self. I felt incompetent. I was also embarrassed by the triggers I carry around. I felt weak.


But a great thing happened as I walked braver and stronger with my friends. They, in front of my eyes, grew in their respect for me. They didn’t consider me incompetent, but the opposite. They didn't think of me as weak, but strong. They didn't think less of me, they thought a little more of me. That is what I talk about all the time - walking braver and stronger together usually ends in the plus column!


What about you? Do you have some unnecessary “emotional decorations” that find their way out of the box and into your life both in and out of season? Why not take a step and talk a bit with your braver and stronger friends. Practice some emotional minimalism. Get rid of your unnecessary emotional decorations!



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